How they play Cricket back in Pakistan? It is so Simple!

Please! This is not my creation, sorry to disappoint you but such a gripping thing can’t be written by me. I am sad geeky soul always pushed into the seriousness of the game ignoring all the fun involved for fans.

Street Cricket in Pakistan

Some one named Ali Farooq at famous Pakistan Defence forum write a post back in 2008 which went under my radar recently and I just can’t stop admiring how interestingly he describe what almost every youngster went through while playing street cricket in Pakistan. Some of them went on to make big names in cricket and some very talented wasted.

I am reproducing Mr. Ali Farooq’s words here and at the end will add some of mine please bear with me.

Cricket and flying kites … An obsession !

On the other hand there are the poor people. Ofcourse, some are more poor than others. They spend their time playing cricket, flying kites and sending out the vibe to Indian movie actresses. A pretty interesting existence if you ask me. Most of these are are very good cicketers and they are definitely very good at ChimooRing kites. The less poor people have motercycle with really loud horns and they hang out in small billiard clubs.

They play cricket with a tape ball (it hurts, trust me) and not just any tape ball. It has to be Nitto tape, preferably red ’cause its easier to see. And while I am at it, I might as well tell you that there are a lot of fake Nitto tapes out-don’t be fooled. The fake Nitto is spelled `Nito’. It gives out after the first over. They play cricket everywhere! On the streets, playgrounds, rooftops, and parking lots. Rules are very strictly followed and they usually favour whoever owns the bat and ball (That’s the only thing you need to play cricket-Plus tape if you are into hard core street cricket). As people grow up, they get better at cricket and they stop bringing their cricketing stuff out to play. Bringing the bat and ball is usually left for a young up and coming cricketer who is not a good player, who can only survive if he owns the stuff. That way he can get more then one “Baree” (turn).

If you have ever played cricket in these circumstances, you probably know how Pakistan comes up with so many good fast bowlers. Playing on a dirt track (grass can’t grow anywhere where there are 11 teams playing cricket 19 hours a day) reduces the effective speed of a ball by about 90%. So you have to use every ounce of your strength to make the ball reach the other end at a reasonable pace. Once it reaches the other end it is greeted by a very impatient man who’ll probably be kicked out of the batting line up (physically forced to retire) if he doesn’t hit a boundry.

Result 1: A man comes running in and hurls a tennis ball wrapped in insulating tape at approximately 90 miles per hour. It reaches the other end of the pitch in less than a second where another man, who is unable to open his eyes because he is putting everything he has in his swing, swings the bat in a wide arc. This raises a huge cloud of dust which makes it impossible for his team mates to see what is going on. Usually what follows is pretty predictable. A. The bat comes down hard enogh to kill a raging bull by one blow, connects with the ball and sends it flying out of the boundary. The batsman’s teammates rush in and congratulate him and tell him that he is the greatest. And they yell “Alloo Alloo” (Potato Potato) at the other team. The bowler is told by every member of his team that he is a worthless by-product of humanity and isn’t fit to go on. Sometimes he is also told that he should come back later after he has grown some hair on his balls.

Result B: The bat comes down hard enogh to kill a raging bull by one blow, doesn’t connect to anything and whooshes by the ground. If the ball goes into the stumps (Usually a chair or two bricks on the ground. Hard core cricketers have iron stumps with a stand and everything) the bowler’s teammates rush in and congratulate him and tell him that he is the greatest. And they yell “Alloo Alloo” (Potato Potato) at the other team. The batsman is told by every member of his team that he is a worthless by-product of humanity and isn’t fit to go on. Sometimes he is also told that he should come back later after he has grown some hair on his balls.

Result C: The The bat comes down hard enogh to kill a raging bull by one blow, doesn’t connect to anything and passes by harmlessly (Unless it hits the wicket keeper where he has been trying to grow some hair-in which case the game is temporarily suspended while people from all the teams, and other neighbouring teams rush in and offer their services to “do” his future wife (’cause he probably won’t be able to do it!). The bowler is given a small compliment by the captain and told to keep it up. The batsman is warned that if he does this again he will be retired.

Result D: The bat comes down hard enogh to kill a raging bull by one blow, and connects to the batsman’s knee. There is a loud crack and everybody thinks it’s a six (Remember? Lots of dust?) When the dust clears everybody sees the batsman laying on the ground with his posterior pointing towards the heavens and making very obscene sounds. The game is temporarily suspended while people from all the teams rush in and make fun of the “Loola” (Cripple) and tell him that he’ll never be able to walk again for the rest of his life. Some also think it’s a good opportunity and offer their services to “do” his future wife, or hold him down while he does it.

It’s a very competitive and violent game. Don’t go into it unless you think you can stand the heat. Kite flying is also an obsession with everybody. People fly kites from rooftops, streets, playgrounds, and parking lots. More! People spend their time eating out, watching movies, playing cricket, flying kites, pool and sending out the vibe to anything that moves. …

Stumps in Street Cricket - Pakistan

Alright! Whatever he said above is not only true but insanly resembles the playing experience of 99% of Pakistani youth. Keep in mind in large cities this trend is getting a beating by video games and internet stuff and that why probably we are producing such shit cricketers these days.

Some Points to note:

• He is absolutely right about fast bowling, in tape ball street cricket if you don’t send tape ball zipping past batsman you will probably went for 12 sixes in two overs. You have to bowl your ass out always. I did tried to bowl off spinners with tape ball by making a special seam of it (wrapping the ball with a circle of fat string and than wrapping it with some rounds of insulation tape making a fake seam. It was successful specially against newbies but hardcore hitters made me never bowl again.
• Wondering about Pakistan fielding? Why so horrible? Was there any reference to fielding? No. Fielders are only used to collect balls from outside of boundary mostly or to collect miss hits. There too they usually don’t take much catches.
• These games are played for 6, 8, 10 or 12 overs only. A 20 over game is like a test match to them which also ends up much earlier. Now you just don’t need to ask why Pakistan is good at T20. Don’t laugh at me I know they are playing shit so far in ICC World T20 2010 but they were best T20 team and may will probably be once again, you never know

Many of you must have such memories, want to share? Comment box is here down under and absolutely free of cost

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